Friday, December 24, 2004

Maestro Parties with Sorority BMV

The Maestro often gets invited to house parties and there he instills his crazy aura and party atmosphere into everyone, which makes them all have a good time. That and the fact that I'm designated i get to mix drinks - I'm pretty good at it, after bartending a lot of parties, the funny thing is i don't have my license yet and I don't think i'll get one - waste of money and time. I see a ton of bartenders out there who literally suck ASS. I mean especially at FH - I saw this guy take out 5 beers - 1 by 1...out of the fridge and proceed to uncap them 1 by 1, taking 2seconds each. I was so pissed I almost jumped over and uncapped his head with the bottle opener....holy fuck, i mean if you're gonna bartend at least pretend like you know what you're doing. The bar was packed this one time....this brown girl in front of me waited more than 30 mins (I had come back after smokes with friends and still she was waiting). In 2 seconds I can uncap all 5 beers and more...and the worst part wasn't this. He looked like one of those football jocks that could tackle 300 pounds of flesh and bone, but took years to open a bottle of beer. I mean you're on the football team for god's sake, don't all your post celebrations end with beer? Or did those cheerleaders open them for you, you big pussy. Sometimes I had to tell bartenders what proportions of alcohol to put in the shots/drinks cause they're RETARDED and lost the CHEAT sheet that they usually have at the bar. Seriously, the biggest bunch of loser bartenders ever. There is the exception of 1. She was the hottest I've ever seen....blonde hair but with asian eyes, perfect 10 body and looks innocent and damn hot at the same time. I would stand at the bar shamelessly staring and flirting the times she was there. And even if she opened beer slower than the Loaf above, I didn't care - I mean the longer she took the more time I had to admire her beauty. I was pretty close to picking her up once, but thought she was out of my league at the time....if I see her now, there's no holding me back.
Several times I considered bartending at FH, but then I thought - How am I supposed to have fun with the ladies if i'm on the other side of the i said screw it, I'll let everyone suffer with the long waits and retarded drink service.

So it's Saturday night and I arrive at Sorority BMV 11pm (3 girls) TwinMee, TwinBee and TwinVee. The parties are usually at TwinBee's place, since she lives alone in a 3 storey, 4 bedroom house with a swimming pool and everything. It's paradise. I met them back in University and they're quite fun when drunk. This must've been around the 5 party we've had and during the day i was chatting with TwinVee about how I wanted always to have an orgy with the 3 of them (TwinVee and TwinMee both had bf's and I didn't mind). This leaves TwinBee who was the only one single. I think it's my compulsive nature that everyone should be with someone at the end of the night, but I told TwinVee that i didn't think TwinBee would be willing to hook up with me casually. Lo and behold, 10 mins later, TwinBee messages me saying "How do you know I won't hook up with you." You can guess what happened after - the floodgates have opened, prepare for full-frontal destruction.

Back to the party, I'm mixing everyone drinks that would get them pasted within 30 mins (i wanted to BBB as soon as possible and I couldnlt do it with TwinMee and TwinVee conscious.) See the problem was TwinMee was pretty close friends with both me and TwinBee and if she found out that i was sleeping with her....things would definitely turn sour. So we had to proceed with caution. A bottle of rum, tequila and vodka were demolished by only 6 ppl. I'm at a point where i can't even pour drinks anymore (i will later pay for this, severely.) TwinMee starts rambling on about me being the most perverted guy ever and I should goto hell. Yes i should, thanks for letting me know. TwinVee pukes all over the bathroom. The time is approaching. They go in their assigned rooms and begin to sleep/fuck. I was coincidentally assigned to TwinBee's room. We were both pretty drunk and at first we just lay there beside each other on the bed. Then it was as if a movie played itself in our heads and we just turned over and made out like we've just got out of prison. I had my condom ready. clothes were off in 10seconds. I was sheathed and ready....for the same amount of time the clothes came off. There was a problem. The Maestro had drank too much - drinking too much drains power from the mighty lightsabre. Couldn't for the life of me get the sucker in. THIS CANNOT BE HAPPENING...she was wide open and ready to go...I curse at the 3 evil empty bottles. we manage to dry hump for about 20 minutes, the bed rocking the hard-wood floor so hard I found out the next morning that BOTH TwinMee and TwinVee couples HEARD it loud and clear. Was I ever fucked. Anyway, I barely finish off and pass out.

The next morning, TwinVee's Bf comes up and says "So Had fun last night?" Shit...they know...what are we going to do. We cleaned up the mess downstairs and I left the house as quickly as I could. I found out later on from TwinBee that TwinVee and her bf fucking broke the wooden futon they were fucking on. Great job, next time do it on the floor. I had to come back and help them fix it with super glue and stuff so her parents don't find out when they return in like a week. And so I return to the house later that night, all the while sneaking gropes and kisses at TwinBee when no one was watching. I thought everything was fine until TwinMee approaches me and says "Did anything happen last night? Did you have sex with my best friend?" I'm like...uh....of course not (well I didn't cause Mr. limpy was having problems - I'm never drinking again.) But she already knew cause she Heard us loud and clear. Damn hardwood floors. Damn the vents that carry breathing sounds to the basement.
Things were a little awkward after - TwinBee felt super guilty about betraying TwinMee - how is it betraying her? Just because TwinMee had feelings for me doesn't mean you can't sleep with me. HAAHHAAHAHAH. And plus, I wasn't going OUT with TwinMee, she friggin has a BF, who by the way is the biggest fruitbag on the planet - The guy hates me with a passion. The guy has eyes burning with jealousy it hurts to look at him. Then again, his eyes aren't straight, so i can never tell if he is really looking at me or not. Yes I'm horrible. Hey, I'm not the only one who thinks this, TwinBee and TwinVee started it first. I'm just re-iterating their comments. After awhile, I finally convince TwinBee to be my FB. It certainly is a major plus when a girl lives by herself in a house. But it is not a plus when she lives with her brother, who comes home every so often. Most of the time, she would call me when her brother leaves for the night to sleep at his Gf's house. I drive over around 11pm-midnight and stay until I have to work the next day. Sometimes multiple sessions get the picture. This continues on for about 2 months and I'm feeling quite happy, until TwinMee messages me and says she broke up with her BF. UH OH. Target locked and acquired: ME. Then she goes on telling me how she already had sex and is no longer a virgin - which to me means "Yes you can fuck me now, cause I'm ready for something casual like you had with TwinBee." How wrong I was, but i didn't know until 6 months later when she got back together with her bf. I'll save that story for another time.

We set a date - clubbing downtown and I prep my car with the necessary materials: Blanket and condoms. Yes even though I'm clean and TwinMee's bf was a virgin before she banged her, I don't want to take my chances. Play safe and use it.
I pick TwinMee up around 10pm and she's pissed that I was late 30 mins - I like doing this, makes the girl all agitated and sexual tension just peaks for them. Anyway, we arrive at the club Distrikt and wait outside for around an hour. Finally get in, bought a couple of drinks and someone removed her collar. She was all over me, grinding and grabbing me everywhere. She even went so far as to slide her hands down my pants and up my shirt. I was sober cause I had to drive and seeing her like this did not please me. TwinMee was not the most attractive girl out there, neither was TwinBee, but at least TwinBee was cuter than TwinMee. Still I looked around to see if I knew anyone and if they saw this crazy biatch stealing a grab at my golden sceptre. The night progresses and I had to get a drink. I think I ordered 2 shots of whiskey and chugged them one after the other. I go back to the dance floor and didn't give a shit what happened at this point. I grab her ass, breasts, even gave her a hickie - in the middle of the dance floor. I've had enough - "lets get out of here." We leave the club and get into the car. Drive back to a well-lit parking lot near her apt. and go nuts. But BEFORE this happens she explains to me how hurt she was when I slept with TwinBee blah blah blah. I told her it's just for fun, just like what we're about to do - it's FUN. We get in the back and go at it....she's screaming my name like there's no tomorrow. I drop her back at her place and we cease contact for about 6 months. She felt too awkward. During this time, I was still BBBing TwinBee and Mary and TheNative. TwinBee never found out that I had this little one niter, until recently hahahaha. Oh well. But to this day, TwinMee still doesn't know that I was BBB her best friend for almost 6 months. Oh well, it shouldn't bother her anyway - why can't they just share me and be happy. Sigh.
I've suggested to TwinVee to join in the fun and BBB me as well. But she loves her BF, and maybe if I didn't BBB both her friends first she would've. I'm not joking. She knows about me and TwinBee that 1 night (not the subsequent FB sessions) and she knows about that one nite with TwinMee. It would be quite satisfactory if I completed the Triumvirate and BBB'ed TwinVee. It shouldn't be that hard, come back from England soon. I'll be waiting. I'm sure your BF wouldn't mind a threesome with me.

To this day, I'm still waiting for that orgy I've been suggesting. Who knows, maybe Christmas? Under the mistletoe?


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